Closure

Recently I was reading some of my favorite blogs and noticed that one of my favorites This and That had posted after a long absence. I was surprised as I read her post that she said that one of her New Years resolutions was to blog LESS. That really hit me. Like, really hit me. I couldn't stop thinking about it for the next few days. I wouldn't have been surprised at all if she would have posted about wanting to blog more, keep updated more, do more projects to post; but no, she said she wanted to blog less and spend more time with her kids. I took notes. I decided that I was trying to do too much too. So I am going to stop posting on Motherhood Answered. I just can't keep coming up with enough stuff to keep this and Small Fry and Co both updated as much as I want. I decided that most of what I was posting here I could post on Small Fry. I was waiting to see if I could get a few more moms to send in questions but maybe there just aren't as many moms that are wanting to do that as I thought. I for one am super grateful for everyone who commented to help answer all of my questions. I have put into practice a lot of the advice given and it has been so helpful: hair doing is going much smoother, Allie gets out of the bath no problem, we are brushing teeth twice a day with success, I feel less guilty about TV watching. So thank you, thank you. Sorry that this didn't go anywhere. I would rather do a really great job at one blog, than a sort of great job at 2. Lets all just go back on over to small fry shall we.

Bedtime reader question

My daughters are 6 and 3. They share a bedroom, and have separate beds. Lately it has become such a battle to get them to go to sleep. They talk and goof off, come in and out of their room, and just will not go to sleep. Last night I started putting them to bed around 7. My oldest (who has to get up early for school) was still awake come 9-9:30. Some nights are even later. I don't know how to get them to go to sleep. Should I put one to bed first and let the other stay up a little later? Do I forfeit the playroom, and give them each their own room? Do I figure out a REWARD system to get them to go to sleep? I am at a loss. They used to be fine and now it is madness. I do stick to a routine before bed, but it isn't helping. Any advice?

Blueberry Muffins Recipe

I was just making these this morning and I thought this would be a great recipe to share with other moms because if any of you are like me you are probably always looking for ways to sneak in the healthy stuff. Well these muffins are perfect for sneaking in whole wheat flour if you don't regularly use it.
The Recipe:

Very Blueberry Whole Wheat Muffins

6 TBSP butter softened

3/4 cup sugar

2 eggs

1/2 cup milk

1 tsp vanilla

1 cup white flour

1 cup whole wheat flour

1 TBSP baking powder

1/4 tsp salt

2 1/2 cups blueberries

Preheat oven to 375. Spray or line muffin tin. NOTE: if you don't think you can eat 12 muffins in one sitting make 1/2 a recipe. These are nice and crunchy when they are hot but are not that great the next day. In a large bowl cream sugar and butter. Add the eggs, stir in milk, and vanilla. Add all dry ingredients and stir just until moistened. Add blueberries and fold in gently. DON'T OVERSTIR. NOTE: if using the frozen blueberries that are really large 2 1/2 cups are too many. You will want to use less. Bake for 25 minutes or until light brown.
DELICIOUS!!!

Stocking my Nursery: Reader Question

I am expecting a baby in about a month-a baby boy. This is my first baby. I was just wondering if I could get a few tips from experienced moms of what type of things I should stock my nursery with besides diapers and wipes. Like are there any things out there that moms would strongly recommend or not recommend? Thanks
Expecting.

Exercise

I have been doing my Cindy Crawford workout video since having the baby and it is one I highly recommend. It has 3 different workouts (the time saver one is the one I do but I just rewind certain parts and do them repeatedly), she did the video after having a baby herself so it is totally geared towards new moms and it isn't totally in your face aerobics. My daughter has been joining in the workouts with me which proves to be interesting each morning.

We made her a set of weights out of her foam blocks. Well anyway usually what happens is she marches for about 30 seconds and then hangs on my legs or tries to push me over the rest of the time. I know she wants to play but I really need to get in my exercise time. Has anyone found any exercise program, DVD, video out there geared towards moms and children together? My mom had this great Mickey Mousercise tape when we were kids that we always did with her (though my younger brother claims he is scarred for life from it- I always enjoyed it.) She got exercise and it felt like we were playing. I would love to have something like that to do with my daughters-well my 20 month old for now and later my other daughter. I want something that is actually exercise but that could be fun for her too. Just wondering if anyone has heard of anything?

Rewards Reader Question

I am a mother of 2 kids ages 3 and 5. I was just wondering if any moms out there would care to share what they use as rewards for their kids for good behavior. I would just like some new ideas for good behavior rewards, or rewards for doing chores etc. Thanks.

Teeth

Should I be making a big deal about brushing my 20 month old daughters teeth? I mean she has a mouth full of teeth? When she was first getting teeth she would let me brush them, then she went through a phase where she wouldn't let me, then she wanted to do it herself. I didn't really push the issue. But now she eats candy (I know, I said I would never let that happen either) and I am wondering if I should be more concerned about brushing. I am successful at getting her to let me do it about 1 in 4 times of asking but I don't ask consistently. Any advice about teeth brushing out there? The doctor told me I shouldn't worry about taking her to the dentist until she is 2 so should I be doing something more serious before that?

Binkies

Question: How many of you mom's out there seriously wash your child's binkie each time it falls on the floor? I can understand washing it when it falls in the dirt, or near the toilet but if your child is just going to crawl around on the floor and suck on her hands anyway then why are we washing the binkie that fell on the floor? I don't know if maybe i should be getting a bad mom award on this one or not but I don't wash the binkie every time it falls on the floor. If I did, I would be doing nothing but going back and forth to the sink. I didn't do it with my older daughter either. I mean the girl ate dirt; washing her binkie when it fell on the sidewalk by our steps was going to do nothing to help keep her sanitary. One time her binkie fell out of her mouth at church on the carpet and the lady near by insisted that she go and rinse it off. THE CARPET AT CHURCH PEOPLE!!!! And I might add my daughter has been sick (to any degree of seriousness once or twice in 20 months). So am I nuts or what? I don't think I need to wash the binkie each time.

Recipe Help for Moms

If you are like me you probably have days where you hate the thought of having to cook breakfast, lunch and dinner. It may not be that you don't like cooking, just the thought of coming up with something and then having to make it that particular day, or week, seems like a burden. Well I have those days and weeks. Menu planning doesn't help me either. But this website has. www.campbellkitchen.com I have seen the commercials, seen it advertised on the cans of soup but just hadn't ever checked it out. Then on one of those "desperate for an idea" days I went there and I was like, "why has it taken me so long?" That is how it is with everything it seems like in my life. I am so stubborn. I always seem to be the last one on board with things, especially if my mom recommends it. If she had told me to go there, it would be at least 6 more months before I would check it out. Sorry mom, stubborn as a mule I am. Anyway the discovery has been made and it has been wonderful. There are tons of recipes. They are easy, with few ingredients and steps (at least the ones I have looked at). And unlike other company recipe websites (Kraft in particular) the recipes actually involve some cooking not just opening up cans of things and warming prepackaged foods (how many recipes do we need with hot dogs and Kraft Macaroni and Cheese anyway Kraft foods? Thank you very much.... I digress) So here is a list of what we have tried that we like (sorry I am not linking each recipe-I have a 20 month old on my lap-enough said).

Baked Pork Chops and Gravy (okay so this one does involve lots of prepackage but you can substitute)

Cheeseburger Pasta

Italiano Chicken and Rice

Quick and Easy Nachos Supreme

We have not yet tried Mini Beef Loaves and Cheesy Chicken Enchilladas Verde

So if you are looking for something new and need some help and you are like me, the last person on earth to check these things out, I highly recommend this website.

Discipline Reader Question

I have 2 boys - 2½ year old and 15 month old. They are the joys of my life. My question is how do other moms discipline their children. I haven’t spanked my babies. I believe in it, I just don’t think they have done anything severe enough to warrant the punishment. They are so little at this point. My 2 ½ year old is pushing my limits more and more every day. We currently have a timeout carpet square “The Green Square” that is used for discipline. I try and channel my inner Joe Frost and be consistent, put them on the square, tell them why they are there and walk away. After the allotted amount of time, I reinforce the “Why” and ask for an apology and love. It works, but now my 2 ½ year anticipates the punishment and once he does something, he says, “Do I need to go to the green square?” My 15 month is becoming more physical with the older one. He has recently been introduced to the green square as well. I’ve started taking favorite toys away as a secondary form of punishment. I don’t yell or scream at my boys and until recently, I haven’t had much problems. I just wondered what other forms of discipline do other mom’s use, other than spanking.

With Love,
Stacee.
staceebrown@charter.net


Keep up with our family moments:
http://brownfamilysoundoff.blogspot.com/

TV time

I always said that I would never let my children watch tv. I even have it written down in a book-you know one of those lists you make before you get married and have kids of all the stuff that is "super important" to you in a marriage and family like marrying a man that doesn't watch sports or that doesn't burp or fart. You know the kind of list I am talking about? Well anyway I didn't want my kids to watch tv, but I am just going to be honest (because that is what this blog is about), that tv is a dang good babysitter and I can get in a shower or get dinner made, laundry folded, or a phone conversation in during Elmo's World and it's a life saver. I don't park my daughter in front of the tv, nor is it on all day. She watches it for a half hour here, a half hour there and maybe a total of 3 hours in the day. She would love to watch it all day and once again I will be honest, somedays I am tempted just to let her. I also don't let her watch any old cartoon that is on. We watch Dora, Elmo's World, Winnie the Pooh and Micket Mouse at our house and while plenty of people have plenty of negative things to say about tv for kids, I can tell that she is learning things while she is watching. This morning while I was changing her diaper she said, "count with me, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10." just as clear as day and while we have been counting numbers for a long time I have never taught her this. I read in a Parenting magazine a comment that went something like, "maybe less blame should be placed on TV and more on parents." I have to agree with that in a lot of ways.

So my question is oo you let your kids watch tv? What are your limits on tv time? How do you decide how much is okay? Do you have limits? Do you think they are necessary?

Supernanny

Do you ever watch Supernanny? I do...I did when I had free time, when I didn't have children. When I was a single teacher I started watching it and I had a parent one time tell me that I reminded her of Supernanny and I took that as a huge compliment and was a big fan ever since.

Well today as I go about my daily mothering tasks I often find myself having silent conversations in my head with Jo Frost (Supernanny). If you have watched the show you know that she goes and observes for a day first and often asks questions of the parents about what they are doing, the children's' behavior, routines etc. So I will be doing something, often times it is something that I am unsure of, maybe I know it is a bad idea (giving candy before dinner to keep my child happy), or maybe it is something that i think I am doing okay at and I imagine Jo asking me, "now why are you doing that mum?" and I try and think of a logical explanation in my head. Sometimes I don't have one and I stop what I am doing, sometimes I don't have one and I say to the imaginary Supernanny standing before me, "I don't know" and I give Allie (my daughter) the candy anyway, and sometimes I explain myself and I can hear Supernanny saying, "wow Heather, that is just awesome, you are such a great mum." It is like she is my personal mommy coach from time to time. Like when Allie is throwing a tantrum because I have put the chips back up on the fridge and told her she is not going to have anymore and I am ready to cave and get the chips back down, I can hear Jo Frost say as she grabs my arm, "What are you doing mum? We don't do tantrums here. You tell her that mummy said no more chips and that is the end of story. Don't give into her. Be strong mum. If you aren't she will never learn," and I square up my shoulders and I say, "Allie, mommy said no more chips and I mean no more chips" and I step over her and continue on with my day, giving my imaginary mommy fairy a big high five.

Well in case Jo Frost ever visits your head here is a great little interview I came across with her and it just makes her all the more real and special to me. Honestly, there have been times I have had no clue what to do with my daughter besides what I had seen on an episode of Supernanny and it has saved me.

I am sure we have all experienced this one

Here is another reader question:

Dear MA
Does it qualify me as a bad mother if my own child annoys me?

I am loving these reader questions. I hope those of you who are asking them will be patient as the blog grows and I get more readers and therefore hopefully more commenters. I think this kind of a blog can really be a great help to a lot of moms so spread the word and please take a minute to share your thoughts when you feel the desire to.

My answer to this question: NO, sorry you don't get a gold statue for bad mother awards for this one. It has just got to be a normal part of being a mom, otherwise there would be alot of us recieving bad mom awards I think. Anyone else?

Labor and Delivery Question

Here is another question from a reader:

Hello Heather, My question is this: I want to know what is crucial to pack for labor and delivery. I am in the stages of packing my bags and I just don't know what I should bring. Although this is baby number 2 and I have packed before I forgot what exactly I brought the first time. Maybe there are somethings that women brought that worked fantastically with the stages of labor that would be helpful to me...If you need me to provide more info, let me know :)I need some help! Lindsey McAulay

http://opiebaby.etsy.com

http://mcaulayfamily.blogspot.com

I know of some great women that could answer this so I hope they are reading. Are you planning on going natural or having an epidural? If you have a birthing ball or can get one I recommend it. It really helps take pressure off your back during labor. There might be one where ever you are delivering. I also recommend as many of your own things as possible like blanket, pillow, pj's, towels -especially towels for after-the ones at my hospital were pathetic. Hoping some other women have some great suggestions for you. Good luck with delivery #2.

A readers question

Yea, my first question from a reader- here is goes

What are ways to safe guard your children on the internet? Do you feel it's safe to post pictures/information of your children that are available to everyone? I often worry about the crazy people out there. You just never know who is looking at what. I worry about the safety of my children. They are so young, I don't want them to be exposed to criminals who would use their photos for adverse things. I am not sure if I am being paranoid, but when my children are involved I feel I can never be too careful. The internet is another way that a complete stranger, who can be a psychopath, can come into my home and see my life.brenda

Good question. I don't know if I would be the best to answer that because obviously I have pictures of my kids on the internet. I know that there are plenty of other moms with the same concern as you so I would like to know what other moms think about this one too.

Toys, toys and more toys

Here is a question about toys. We don't have room in our house for a separate toy room so my children's toys are just in our everyday living space. I don't really mind this because I can see my daughter play while I do other things but I also have a really hard time having toys flung from one end of the house to the other. I try to encourage her to pick up after she is done playing with one thing and definitely before she gets out another big messy set of toys (like clean up all the crayons before the blocks come out)-she has a tendency to just want to dump one bin after another (anyone else have a child like that?) But at the same time I know that she is just little and lives here too. So in an attempt to have a happy medium somewhere between a picturesque Pottery Barn Catalogue home and a pigsty what am I to do with the toys? Just wondering for those who don't have play rooms, do you just try and deal with the toys all over for the day and then have a major clean up at night, do you pick up after child throughout the day, do you have him or her clean up everything each time they are through? I pick up a bit during naps times and try and have her pick up some and I try and live with some scattered toys but man sometimes it is all I can do not to just throw them all in a toy bin and put a lock on it and I don't want her to think for a second that mommy is her personal maid. Looking for some toy ideas. Surely someone else out there has this problem too.

Something to think about for 2010

This came from a quote by President Dieter Uchtdorf (of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day saints). He said a wise man or in this case woman could distinguish between the noble art of getting things done and the nobler are of leaving things undone. (Julie B. Beck, “Relief Society: A Sacred Work,” Ensign, Nov 2009, 110–14) That hit me like a ton of bricks because I am always racing around trying to get so many things done and sometimes even while I am doing them I am thinking "why am I doing this?" when maybe I should be looking at things a little more carefully and choosing what really needs to get done and what can be left unfinished. Case in point- I was trying to make a set of felt food for a niece for Christmas and it started out really well and I wanted to do a good job because I didn't feel like an okay set of felt food would be appreciated but I didn't have all the materials I needed and it was taking more time than I wanted and every time I went in my craft room before Christmas I saw the pile of unfinished felt food and it bugged me and I felt an obligation to finish but didn't want to. Finally after reading this quote I decided I would abandon the project, buy a gift that came with in the allotted gift budget and give what I had already completed to my daughter. A huge weight was lifted from my shoulders, Allie (my daughter) loves the foods and the problem was solved. I resolve this year to leave more unnecessary things undone. How about you?

Question # 2 Bath time

How do you get your child out of the bathtub when bath time is over? I used to just tell my daughter the bath was done and it was time to get out and I would reach down and scoop her up and get her out no problem. But now when the bath is done I tell her I am letting out the water and when it is gone she will need to get out and even when the tub is empty she does not want to get out. She just wants to lay in the empty cold tub. I can reach down and get her myself but that always leads to crying and I would like to have her get out on her own when the bath is done. The only thing I have found that is working right now is that I tell her that I will count to 5 and when I get to 5 I will start closing the shower curtain and she needs to get out. But the only reason why I think this is working is that it scares her and I don't want her to listen to me out of fear but I am not sure what else to do. Any good ideas out there?

Question #1

I will just jump right in with my first question: doing hair. I will start with this topic since I found myself this morning chasing after my almost 2 year old trying to get an extra pillow curler or two into her hair before we had to go to church. Doing her hair would be compared to trying to french braid the tail of a wild yak. She doesn't sit still and doesn't like getting it done. I don't try and do too much with it and some days just comb it, but it looks so cute when it is curled or in pig tails or a ponytail that I just love to do it somedays, well that is until I am chasing her around the house trying to catch her, distract her and get the hair done without it being pulled out only moments later. As I am doing it I think to myself, "is this really necessary?" How important is it for her hair to be done? Does it really matter if her hair is ever done? Should I stick with it to teach her that our hair must be done before we leave the house, or that if mommy says we are doing hair then she needs to listen or should I just let it lie because she is only 2 and who really cares? And for all the moms out there with girls with really cute hair, were you once chasing your child around the house and she finally has just given in, are there tears involved in the process (now or ever) or how do you get your child to sit still long enough to do her hair?

Lets get this party started

I don't have all the answers. I wish that I did. I find myself with mom questions everyday from doing hair, to eating vegetables to naps. I look things up in a book occasionally but my toddler or my baby never seems to do anything by the book and so I find myself wondering, "what do I do?" Well experience is usually the best teacher and heavens I know there are plenty of experienced women out there reading and writing blogs so I decided to call on you. I wanted to create a blog where I could ask questions, or you could ask questions and we could share answers and experiences, tidbits and hints. So that is what this is all about. I'll start with the questions that I have and hopefully others will want to contribute too; either with questions or comments. I have 2 girls, currently 20 months and 2 months, so most my questions will be geared towards them and their age group but this blog isn't limited to that age or to just girls. If you have a question that you would like to ask please e-mail me at thecanuck8@hotmail.com and I will be happy to post your question or leave me a comment with your question.
Questions can be about your kids, you, running a household; really anything that a mom has to do on a daily basis.
Let's go moms!!